Saturday, January 8, 2011

"So, do you have any kids?"

Why am I always tempted to answer,"Yes. I have 25. 14 boys and 11 girls."

I feel as though being a teacher is something that constantly tests you.
It feels like every day my patience is tested, my love for them is tested, my devotion and passion for the job is tested...

But every time I'm "tested," the answer is the same every time.

When I am away from my students, I miss them terribly. When I am with them, I love them unconditionally, despite how they can try my ability to endure their whining, complaining, and moaning. When I see any of them get upset in the least or show any sign of discomfort on their face, I am literally by their side in a second, just hoping I can help rescue them in some way.

It's amazing to me that I can feel this away about a group of children that are not mine, and yet they feel like they are nothing but mine. When I read the words for the spelling bee today out loud as the pronouncer, I couldn't help but feel their anxiety and nervousness as each one of my students got on stage. Almost all at once, I wanted to hug the ones that didn't get the word right, and high-five the ones that did.

Maybe I'm not a mother by exact definition...but it sure feels like it sometimes.

If I can feel this much emotion and feeling with children who I will only see for 10 short months of one year of our lives, than I can only imagine how incredible it will be to be a mother to my own children.

I am in no means ready to be a mother right now or anytime soon. But it's nice to think that I do have a chance to be one right now, in a different sort of way.

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